A 35 year-old Kansas woman apparently misunderstood the phrase, "Shit or get off the pot."
According to police, the woman was somehow stuck to the toilet seat... for two years!
"She was not glued. She was not tied. She was physically stuck..." said the sheriff. Her legs had atrophied. She was flushed and "seemingly disoriented" when authorities first arrived. While she refused medical attention, they finally persuaded her to go to a hospital. In order to get her there, they had to pry the toilet seat off with a crowbar. It went with her to the hospital.
While the boyfriend insists the extended rest-stop was her idea, police wonder why it took him two years to report the incident. He apparently brought her sustenance throughout her ordeal. Police suspect abuse.
No shit.
© C Harris Lynn, 2008
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