Old Woman's Roo'ed Encounter

A 67-year old retiree was picking flowers near her home in the small town of Sunbury, near Melbourne, when she was attacked by a kangaroo. The roo knocked her down and clawed her. While the entire encounter only lasted about 30 second, she suffered scratches to her head, neck, and back severe enough to warrant surgery.

Some believe the kangaroo attacked because it was hungry. Townspeople note kangaroos have been approaching the houses in the neighborhood more frequently lately and many had feared an attack. Droughts in the region have killed much of the grasses the marsupials usually eat.

In March, a kangaroo bounded through a window in Canberra. It destroyed the bedroom before the homeowner found the courage to displace it by putting it in a "headlock" and dragging it outside. Last year, we brought you a similar report of an attack on an elderly woman. In that attack, her dog chased off the kangaroo, but not before she also suffered serious wounds.

© C Harris Lynn, 2009

Wombat TP

Australian... industrialists? Someone in Australia had been playing with poo, kangaroo poo to be more specific, trying to make various products from it, such as paper. Because these animals are herbivores, their waste is largely fibrous. When tourists were introduced to the concept, they would ask questions such as "Can you make it from sheep, koalas, etc." The animal most mentioned, though, was the wombat. So Creative Paper, a company local to Burnie, decided to find out.

Everyday, a local farmer collects the droppings from his single womabt, named Nugget. The waste is then sent to Creative Paper, which boils it down, and creates novelty toilet paper for sale to tourists. While workers say it smells "horrific, as you can imagine" while being boiled, once processed, it bears no scent.

© C Harris Lynn, 2009

Man Bites Snake - Now This is News!

A Kenyan man bit the tail of a python to escape its deadly grasp, but there's oh so much more to this wonderful story:

Ben Nyaumbe said he "stepped on a spongy thing" and was suddenly in a fight for his life. The python, which he surmised had been preying on livestock, coiled around his leg, starting what would be a three-hour fight between man and snake.

Nyaumbe's tenacity and quick-thinking are all that saved him: he put his shirt over the serpent's head to keep it from swallowing him and got to his cellphone when the python released its grip at some point. When police arrived, they wanted to shoot the snake, but were afraid of injuring Nyaumbe.

Finally, Nyaumbe's boss and several villagers tied a rope to the snake and brought both serpent and entangled victim crashing to the ground. There, they managed to help Ben Nyaumbe free himself.

The single most interesting thing about this case is that the python dragged Ben Nyaumbe into a tree! Time and again, eyewitnesses have made claims to pythons swallowing children, even adults, as well as to the fact that truly large serpents exist. "Experts" have dismissed all such stories and explained-away most photographic evidence as trickery or illusion. According to most Western world "experts," no python grows large enough to swallow a man whole, regardless of the persistence of such stories, regardless of photographic evidence.

The Superintendent of the Malindi District where this occurred, Peter Katam, told the BBC, "If it wasn't for the villagers and officers who helped him, he would have been swallowed by the snake over the Easter holiday.

"It's very mysterious, this ability to lift the man onto the tree. I've never heard of this before."

Police took the python to a sanctuary, but it escaped. The village is now in fear of the beast, for which they say they "are still seriously looking." Supt. Katam added, "We want to arrest the snake."

© C Harris Lynn, 2009

Land That Elusive Admin Job

So you have the diploma, you have the experience, you have the initiative - but McDonald's isn't hiring right now and you can't afford gas to drive all over town, randomly seeking "Help Wanted" jobs. Besides, you have the diploma, you have the experience; you want to land one of them high-falutin' admin jobs you were told that diploma and experience would help you do!

Well, you are going to have to tear yourself away from daytime TV (you knew better than to get involved in that stuff, anyway) and make the decision to sit in front of your computer. Or rearrange the room so that you can see the TV while you're online (we won't tell). Either which way you do it, get crackin' at Administrative Jobs and find yourself the job you know you are capable of holding.

It's a real bad situation out there right now, but those executives seem to be doing pretty well. Why shouldn't you be one of them?

The World's Oldest Baby

No ladies, this is not a post about your husbands. This is the curious case of India's Jerly Lyngdoh, a 26-year old man with a 2-year old's body and a 65-year old's teeth. Lyngdoh's entire body is perfectly proportioned for a toddler. It is not until he smiles that you realize Jerly Lyngdoh is... different.

Lyngdoh suffers from a condition which is basically the opposite of progeria (the super-advanced aging disease); it is not a stunted-growth case. A pediatrician, working with a colleague, who examined him said, "We think this is a case of pan-hypo pituitarism leading to poor secretion of growth hormones from the pituitary gland." He then called Jerly Lyngdoh "a genuine rarity."

You can see his teeth are already rotting, and Lyngdoh also suffers from seizures. He is possessed of the mental capacities befitting a child and cannot speak. Jerly is entirely dependent on his mother. Jerly's maternal grandparents even considered him a curse on the family and urged his mother to wack him!

While his condition might have been treatable had it been caught earlier, his poor, illiterate, agrarian parents did not have the money to pursue medical treatment. His mother did take him to a traditional healer, but the healer was unable to cure him of his epilepsy. The examining team eliminated genetics as a factor, as none of Lyngdoh's six siblings suffer any abnormalities.

A charity helped his mother, Merilda, get him to a reputable medical facility, where he was closely studied for 17 months before being moved to a more advanced hospital. The team overseeing his treatment and studying his condition are hoping to get help from the larger medical community.

© C Harris Lynn, 2009

Perry Mason Arrested for Practicing Law

44-year old Perry Mason of Houston was arrested for barratry, which is a third-degree felony. Reports say Mason was soliciting former jail inmates for an unnamed lawyer. The lawyer was also arrested, but released Wednesday on bond.

Perry Mason, portrayed by Raymond Burr in the classic TV series and several made-for-TV movies, was based on the equally popular novel series by creator, Erle Stanley Gardner. It ran for nine years and garnered Burr two Emmys. The made-for-TV movies continued up to 1993.

© C Harris Lynn, 2009

Gay Tactics? Release Your Inner Cannibal!

23-year old Zacharie Morrison plead guilty to aggravated assault in January, regarding an attack he made on then 31-year old Aaron Helferty in which he bit the man's nose - hard enough that Helferty has since undergone surgery to repair it. But that's not that interesting:

Morrison told the court-appointed psychologist that he became enraged when he saw the older man "grab" a girl on the dancefloor and approached him. At this point, Morrison says Helferty adopted "gay tactics" by trying to dance with him before grabbing him by the throat. Morrison said it was at this point that, "The cannibalist in me came out. It was really frightening for me." One can only imagine how it was for Mr. Helferty. The psychologist also recorded the following statement: "Biting should only be used as a last resort and not as a fight tactic, according to Bruce Lee the martial artist." This information was entered into evidence in the Canadian court.

While all of this sounds rather bizarre, we have to remember it is being presented completely out of context; were you to record any conversation word for word and present only certain parts of it, it could likewise be perverted. The psychologist recommended anger management classes and a "career path" for Morrison, but noted he was a "medium risk" for re-offense.

The prosecutor wants to see him serve up to 30 years in prison.

© C Harris Lynn, 2009

Zero Radius Sinks

Sienna brings you commercial quality Angular sinks at the residential price. These beautiful zero radius sinks are 10" deep and are made of Chromium/Nickel stainless steel or heavy-duty, 16-gauge steel. They are utilitarian for the large family and artful for any home or apartment - especially if you work in the restaurant or catering industry. They would also be great in any artist's, or painter's, studio, where they would provide more than enough room for cleaning equipment and washes.

Not only does Sienna have them at over half-off the manufacturer's suggested retail price, they are on sale right now for less than that! An absolute must if you are in the market for sinks, or just looking to redecorate the kitchen.

All These Em-Effin' Snakes on This Em-Effin' Plane!

In a scene straight from a cheesy horror movie, an Australian flight was grounded when a shipment of baby pythons got loose in the cargo bay. The snakes, just 6" long, can grow up to a yard in length. They were being shipped to Melbourne in an aerated plastic bag inside a foam container with holes punched in it. No one knows how they escaped.

Passengers were put on other flights and the plane was fumigated. The bodies of the pythons have yet to be found... (I smell a sequel!)

© C Harris Lynn, 2009

Hey, Pig - Yeah, You

Since the HBO special documentary last month, it seems that pigs have suddenly become the cause... du jour. The truth is that most pig farms are pretty "humane," for as far as that goes, and pork is damned tasty.

While perhaps not the cornerstone of Western civilization, pork is certainly one of the most popular meats in the Western world. And, as Richard da Costa writes, "If we are going to eat animals... then we must accept that they must be killed to be eaten."

And while vegetarians - especially vegans - argue we meat-eaters are "base," abusive murderers and so on and on, they're mostly angry because they're dying for a porkchop.

© C Harris Lynn, 2009

Our Drunken Ancestors

A US team under the leadership of the professor of anthropology at the University of Pennsylvania, Patrick McGovern, used organic compounds and cutting-edge science to determine that liquid recovered from a vase some 5000 years old contained alcohol. The container was excavated from Egyptian tombs dating back to around 3150BC. They are the earliest jars, or amphora, discovered so far containing liquid.

Professor McGovern said the findings prove that our ancestors were using trial and error to develop medicinal concoctions, and that alcohol was a key ingredient. Other ingredients in the liquid are known medicinal components, and include herbs and tree barks. The professor notes that alcoholic brews would have been particularly well-suited for dissolving these ingredients.

The professor is now collaborating with a team at the University of Pennsylvania's Abramson Cancer Center in testing the oldest alcoholic beverage in existence - liquid found in China which dates back to around 7000BC. He is hoping to recreate some of the compounds.

© C Harris Lynn, 2009

The Taxman Cometh

I did not receive one of my 1099s until mid-March and there is far too much going on in my life right this minute, so I am still filing taxes. The good news is that the government owes me money (as well it should!); the bad news is that I don't think I'm going to be able to finish filing everything before midnight, so who knows when I'll get it?

Anyway, I'm always collecting stories as I come across them, I just can't always get here to post them before they become "old." Such is the case this week. If I get done in time - or, conversely, realize I will not be able to and file an extension - I'll be back with some more entries. Otherwise, I'll see you later this week.

Also, I told you I have until 3:00p, April 30^th to be moved out of here, so there's that. Just an incredibly busy month.

© C Harris Lynn, 2009

Mesothelioma

You may have seen the ads on TV, saying that if you have contracted mesothelioma, you may have a legal claim - and indeed, you do. The only known cause for the disease, which is pretty rare, is exposure to asbestos. Even when I was going into the sixth grade, my school was being remodeled to remove the asbestos, so while it has been known to cause cancer for years, it was still in some buildings all the way to at least the late 1980s.

Men are most commonly affected by the disease, though cases in women have been reported. And you can find out a whole lot more about this disease simply by following the link above. Whether you, or someone you know, is afflicted, or you simply want to learn more about the disease, what it entails, and who is affected, this site has it all.

Yemen Tribsemen Release Dutch Couple

While traveling in the city of Sanaa, a Dutch couple was seized by Yemen tribesmen and forcibly removed from the urban area. They were relocated to a mountainous region nearby. There, they say the tribesmen treated them well, offering them food, drink, and tea. In fact, the husband was shown on TV, pleading with the Dutch government not to use military force to free them. They were held for nearly two weeks; they were kidnapped on March 31^st.

Yemen tribesmen are known to kidnap unsuspecting victims. They use them as bargaining chips when dealing with the controlling government. The Dutch couple (Jan Hoogendoorn and his wife Heleen Janszen, 54 and 49, respectively) were kidnapped in retaliation for the wounding of six tribesmen by Yemen police last year. The tribe was hoping to use them as bargaining chips for compensation.

The couple was said to be in good condition and on their way back to Sanaa.

© C Harris Lynn, 2009

"Deathbed" Confessor Recovers, Charged for Murder

James Brewer thought he was on his deathbed following a stroke. Desperate to enter Heaven and die with a clear conscience, Brewer confessed to shooting a 20-year old neighbor some 32 years ago. Then he made a miraculous recovery.

Brewer explained how he shot and killed 20-year old neighbor, Jimmy Carroll in 1977. He was even charged for the crime, but he jumped bail and fled Tennessee for Oklahoma. Brewer changed his name to Michael Anderson and lived with his wife for 32 years before the stroke landed him in the hospital. He had thought Carroll was trying to seduce his wife.

Anderson, nee Brewer, surrendered to Tennessee police.

© C Harris Lynn, 2009

Stemulite

Have you heard of Stemulite? It is one of these "superfood"-type supplements that claims to work for a myriad of health complaints - weight loss, sleep, muscle gain, and more. It has been featured on numerous news broadcasts and channels, and the site is loaded with testimonials from please clients, including one athlete who says he had his doctor check it out before he ever took it (to avoid being popped for "banned substances") - he says not only did it pass the banned substances criteria, his doctor called and recommended it!

Of course, you are right to be skeptical. Testimonials can be faked and videos may contain actors hired to say whatever the script and director tell them to. While Stemulite appears to be legitimate, there are several similar products on the market with the same claims. However, almost none of them have the wealth of testimonials and... "evidence" Stemulite presents. I am not saying it is 100% credible, mind you, just that a lot of the competing products have been considered so with far less to offer by way of "proof."

Of course, all dietary such things work differently for differnt people, and you may have to try it just to see for yourself, but if even half the claims Stemulite makes are true, this is an amazing product, good for pretty much everyone!

California Tar Balls

Large balls of tar washed up on the shores of Coronado Beach in California late last week. Altogether, there was enough to fill a 55-gallon drum. Beachcombers were warned to steer clear, though they were not thought dangerous.

Experts note this waste could be from an earlier spill, not from one reported Saturday. However, the tarballs were first reported Saturday. Samples from the balls found are being examined and compared to the diesel spill Saturday.

© C Harris Lynn, 2009

Lego My Christ

A church in Sweden unveiled a 6' statue based on the popular image of Jesus Christ which parishioners had fashioned out of Lego blocks. The statue took 40 people, 18 months, and 30,000 Lego blocks to create. About 400 people showed up to the Protestant church to view the unveiling.

The statue was based on Danish sculptor, Bertel Thorvaldsen's, Christus, which is on display in Copenhagen. The outside of the statue is made entirely of white bricks, though the inner blocks are of all different colors.

© C Harris Lynn, 2009

Research First

One of the most important steps to take before you do anything else is research. A lot of people overlook this crucial stage, preferring to dive straight into whatever they are undertaking. While it is true that you can do too much planning, doing too little is almost always more disastrous. Never is this truer than where your health is concerned.

If you are overweight and desperately want to drop those extra pounds, check out consumerpricewatch.net before you make a purchase. They have reviewed over 200 of the top supplements and have decided on the best weight loss pills, based on user reviews concerning a 12-point criteria system. The system includes criterion such as price, quality, weight loss potential, and more - all of the things you want to know before you spend your hard-earned money on expensive dietary supplements that might not work for you.

Researching your options before you jump into anything is vitally important. Check out consumerpricewatch.net before you buy!

Easter Weekend

Our "celebration" consisted of eating - a lot. We roasted a ham in pineapple juice (it was delicious!), and I made a sweet potato pie (my first - it was also the first time I made a non-graham cracker pie crust) and my famous peanut butter cup pie. It was fun, despite the work involved. Speaking of which, there is still a sinkful of dishes.

I actually found a lot of interesting stories regarding Good Friday and Easter that I wanted to bring you. But you've surely heard how we Southerners dealt with a large storm system this weekend and there's another one on the way today. It didn't really hit us, even though we were directly in its path, shifting at the last minute, but we thought for sure it was on its way, so we had to take precautions regardless. I'm not bothering with it today, which means we will probably get hit by a twister...

We'll fly across that bridge when we get to it.

So I'm getting an incredibly early start on things today - before they interrupt TV and all that. Hopefully, I'll be able to get a bunch of stuff out to you, regardless of storm systems.

© C Harris Lynn, 2009